Though they met during the first season of “The Bachelorette,” Trista and Ryan Sutter have managed to avoid the drama and breakups that have plagued many of the series’ other stars. The couple has been married for over a decade, has two children and a seemingly happy relationship. So it was a surprise to see the couple on the new show “Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars.” The Sutters joined HuffPost Live to discuss the state of their union, and why divorce is not an option for them.
The couple wanted to use their new reality show to show other couples that even happy partners can work on their marriage. “We’re normal. We’re just like everybody else, and we have issues like everybody else,” Trista told host Caitlyn Becker.
“And they’re not maybe as significant as others, in terms of getting us to the big ‘D’ word — divorce — but for me, I wanted to personally take the opportunity to show viewers that you don’t have to be in a bad place to actually want to better your relationship, to want to get stronger and improve.”
She continued, “So that’s what I want to show people, is that we were happier than ever before we started the show, and we got great tools and were able to really learn how to communicate better, and hopefully that will give us the launching platform into the next few decades.”
Ryan added, “I think too many people consider it an option and if you just don’t consider it an option, then you’re forced to work through things. It’s sort of, almost like if you considered it almost as significant as dying. You know, you wouldn’t just say, ‘well, the solution to this problem is I just have to die.'”
“So you just figure out a way to go on living, and go on making your marriage work. And that’s not to say that everyone should do that — some marriages just need to end.”
He explained, “You work on it and eventually you get to the point where you’re working on it so much that …” Trista jumped in to finish her husband’s thought, “it takes away from you know, the good stuff in life.”
She shared that her parents were divorced, and ultimately it was a boon for their family. “I’m proud that they were able to do that for me and for the family and recognize that everyone would be happier in the end.”
“But for us, it just hasn’t been an option. I think if we continue to strive to be better, and keep our relationship as number-one priority, then it won’t be an option in the future.”